Tuesday, December 11, 2007

John Wayne as Hondo with his dog

"Real Americans like Jack are getting hard to find."

1 comment:

The Duke said...

The only date your going to get tonight is the one where you go home and blow up your inflatable doll.

I’d have you shot at sunrise but it would ruin a perfectly good day.

Are ‘YOU’ looking for an argument?

Yes sire, I will stick with the old jerk-off policy of whenever it gives me a hard time I will just beat it.

Excuse ‘ME’, well just kiss my lily white ass!

So I hear your wife went to the hair loss for men shop.

Hey babe call me, we’ll do lunch sometime.

Girl I am about to cum in my pants just looking at you so lets not waste a good load.

Boss I’d like to work overtime but I am meeting your wife for sex.

Show me the ‘MONEY.’

While you’re breaking a few eggs to make an omelet I’ll be popping a few cherries to get my rocks off.

Just call me ‘Daddy.’

You have your people call my people and we’ll see about it.

I don’t eat chic food.

You’re just a dirty little poop face.

Ladies, to a ‘Man’ aromatherapy is a pound of hot bacon cooking for breakfast.

Please ask your sister to stop stealing my jock strap.

Are you aware that your daughter is washing windshields down the corner while topless?

Please don’t feed the Real-a-tard Trolls.

If you buy me a hamburger today I’ll gladly pay you back next Tuesday.

Hey those nicotine smoking withdrawals are a bitch but seeing you reduced to sniffing cigarette butts in a bar ashtray is just too much.

Hey you may think I’m just a NERD but I am the guy hacking into your computer and stealing your life.

Constipation Relief - Try this remedy and have fun at the same time: Buy some sexual scented edible body oil, find a sweet young thing, lick it off her sensual areas, and let nature takes it course.

My boss is a real ‘Bitch’ but its nothing that two weeks of solid anal sex couldn’t cure.

Get off the table Mabel the two dollars is for the beer!

Asian gals what is there not to like ... petite small frame, tight asses, and firm tits.

Please tell your son to stop walking around without a t-shirt on with a sign hanging around his neck that reads: Oil Me For a Quarter.

Share your sanity with the world keep your madness to yourself!

Remember don’t piss in your shoes when you’re drunk it will cause you to slosh when you walk.

I took her to the concert, I took her up front to watch, I took her backstage .... I just took her !!

The Sons of Bitches have got to PAY!

Your wife is so ugly my dog throws-up when it looks at her!

That ‘Engagement Ring’ you gave her is for the future ring you’ll get through your nose.

I get most of my woman simply by asking them, “Do You Want To Fuck?” I do highly recommend that you stand at least 10 feet away when you ask just to be safe that is.

I have an open invitation for Darth Vader to come over and have lunch.

Did you ever notice that people who claim to have been abducted by aliens are worthless nobody little shits .. hell that proves they are either seeking attention and have serious mental defects or even a ‘Fucking Alien’ doesn’t want them .. what losers!

You need to be fucked, and often, and by someone who knows how.

Mama loves shortbread .. shortbread!

Boy, I’m gonna shove my hand down your throat, pull out your heart, and mail it to your mother.

Hey let’s face it Americans are good old-fashioned Road Runner cartoon watching homegrown style violent prone kick ass people. So let’s ‘Rock’ and kick some Muslim ass.

Mama Mia that’s a spicy meatball.

Fuck’em ALL the long, the short, and the tall.

I really don’t give a hairy rats ass!

Are you feeling lucky, well are you punk?