John Wayne as Hondo with his dog

says,
"Real Americans like Jack are getting hard to find."

Stewie says, Read Jack's Stuff or Else

Arnold Schwarzenegger

says,
"I'll terminate you if you don't read Jack's Daily Insults."

Archie Bunker

says,
"If you don't find Jack's Daily Insults funny then you are a 'Meat Head."

Marvin the Martian

says,
"Listen to Jack or I will destroy you all."