Monday, July 30, 2007

Confucius say, That Jack one darn smart fella

1 comment:

Jack's Expressed Thoughts said...

So what’s your worthless ass gonna do? Talk the Talk or Walk the Walk.

What a F.U.B.A.R. – Fucked Up Beyond All Recognition!

Does your Mommy know what you’re doing?

Hey lady would you mind if I parked my car in your garage?

Hey don’t crowd me in line here fella don’t you see I have my tongue up the lady’s 
ass in front of me?

Ladies I never use a condom I can’t stand the smell of burnt rubber.

I have to piss so bad my back teeth are floating.

The best way for me to tell you what I think of that person is ‘If they were crawling 
across the desert dying of thirst I’d be the first one to offer them a peanut butter 
sandwich.’

Hey if you allow someone to piss in your shoes you’re gonna ‘Slush’ when 
you walk.

There are many ways to measure success; not the least of which is the way 
your child describes you when talking to a friend.

You silly ass useless little twit.

When I finally get bed confined at some old folks home, I hope I get a nurse with 
big hooters, a tight ass, and legs that go all the way up, so I can dream of what it 
use to be while she is wiping the drool off my chin and giving my special private 
parts that bath.

Hey babe I’d like to dip my stick in and check your oil.

My high school principal told me once, “Son no matter what color skin you have, 
no matter what your politics, no matter how much money you earn, and no matter 
what religion you are .. some people just aren’t going to like you .. it’s because 
you’re irritating!!”

As I was saying, “Blah Blah Blah.”

Ah things are looking better now I just had a three-martini lunch.

Go ahead girl ‘Make my Day, Take your Panties Off for Me.’

Absolute ‘Power’ corrupts absolutely!

Look she’s wearing her Red Nike’s it must be ‘Prom Night.’

Honest officer, ‘I only had SEX with her three times, when she was tied up; 
when she was drunk; and when she was asleep.’

I heard your father got a new job. He sits on streets corners, pretends he’s 
blind, begs for money, and looks up woman’s skirts all day.

I just joined a ‘New’ fraternity: Alpha Bet You Get Me Sum.

You babe, right now I am undressing you with my eyes.

I know the fine parts of a woman like I know my own hand.

I ‘Understand’

My dog ate its first pussy today but it has a fur ball stuck in its throat.

If you could harness the ‘Force’ you could fuck any girl you wanted to from 
across the room.

WOW I would love to snorkel in her alfalfa.

I personally suggest you never be rude to someone who can spit in your food!

Incest its not just for Family Pedophiles and Rednecks anymore!

Your just an over used marathon Barbie Doll look-a-like tramp, but you’ll do.

Real MEN Hate CATS!

Road Rage it’s no longer just for Californians, lets all get in on it, arm yourself 
kill ALL ‘Left Hand Slow Moving Drivers.’

Save water shower with your honey ...

It’s hard to look at girls when you had your binoculars stolen out of your 
pick up truck.

Support your local police, fuck a meter maid today!

Hurry ‘Beam’ me the fuck up!